How Far
by Lillei
Summary: Little LJ song fic.


Hello, my readers! This has all ready been posted twice- once as a one-shot, once in a collection of one-shots. Yet here I am, posting it again. Mostly because I miss having my work spread out, where I can see it. That said, please read it again and review. 

I just realized, I don't really like writing song fics. They just don't work out for me. But I'm posting it again anyway, k? This is by Martina McBride, by the way.

How Far?

"Lily!" James Potter was practically begging, something which he had only ever done before twelve times…ever.

Lily Evans was not even fazed. He had begged her often enough that the novelty of it had worn out.

"Lily, please, just tell me…what'd I do?" James asked his girlfriend, eyes wide, face flushed, looking at her helplessly.

"James, I thought you'd grown up." Lily said, disappointment oozing from her. "But as soon as I agree to date you, you're back up to you're old tricks, like I'm just gonna excuse you for it now!" Lily shot him a cold look as he threw himself onto a couch in the Gryffindor common room. Everyone else was outside, enjoying the weather, celebrating the ends of N.E.W.T.s while he was in here, listening to Lily rant. "I don't mind you're harmless pranks, in fact, I enjoy them, but bullying people is only going to get laughs for so long. Eventually they'll realize what a cruel thing you're doing."

"Fine!" James snapped in a burst of pride. "Go date someone…nice…then."

"James," Lily said consolingly. "Sometimes I really love you." James's expression twitched, though he did not meet her eye. "And I think that what I saw today wasn't the real you. I am positive that you've changed James. You're more understanding. And I've changed, I mean, I don't get upset over insignificant things anymore, and I'm less uptight…but James, this isn't an insignificant thing!"

"You've got to try to make this work." He didn't look at her, but Lily knew him well enough to see that it was out of hurt pride. "I'm leaving now James," she said softly, almost painfully.

_There's a boat I can sail away_

"Come and find me when you've decided if you're going to try or not," she requested of him.

_There's the sky I could catch a plane_

"Goodbye James."

_There's a train There's the tracks_

The goodbye sounded very final to James; it echoed in his head as if it were an empty chamber.

_I could leave And I could choose to not come back_

"Bye," he eventually whispered miserably to an empty room.

_Oh, never come back_

James slumped miserably into the couch.

_There you are Giving up the fight_

He remembered Lily's words. 'Come find me…"

_Here I am Begging you to try_

James shifted restlessly and punched a pillow. He wished he could say he didn't care, that he was this person who she claimed he wasn't, the she didn't matter to him.

_Talk to me Let me in_

But he couldn't.

_But you just put Your wall back up again_

But he couldn't tell her either.

_Oh, when's it gonna end?_

She was walking away from him, really and truly. Letting him see how far he could push her…literally.

_How far Do I have to go to make you understand?  
I wanna make this work So much it hurts But I just can't!  
Keep on giving, keep on living With the way things are So I'm gonna walk away And it's up to you to say How far…"_

"Lily," James whispered desperately, and scrambled out of the portrait hole. She was there.

_There's a chance I could change my mind_

"Uhh," his mind went blank, his body cold.

_But I won't Not 'til you decide_

"I-uhm- wasn't myself today, I know that's not an excuse but I…did it out of righteous anger, see, and you're totally right, it was stupid, and cruel and I think I'm starting to hate myself for it-"

_What you want What you need_

"I'm…uhh…" His face went hard, pride stopped him from apologizing. "Well, ya know what I mean." "Can't say it?" Lily asked him. "Or won't?"

_Do you even care If I stay or leave?_

She gave him a wry smile and walked from him, red hair aglow from the sunlight. "How far is it gonna be, James?" She asked, before turning a corner, visibly gone.

_Oh, what's it gonna be?_

James ran after her, pride forgotten. She wasn't around the corner bend, she was…no where to be seen.

_How far Do I have to go to make you understand?  
I wanna make this work So much it hurts But I just can't!  
Keep on giving, keep on living With the way things are So I'm gonna walk away And it's up to you to say How far…_

To his horror, tears formed in his eyes and his body began to shake. He slunk down the wall beside a doorframe and pulled his knees to his chest, too caught up in needing her to worry about someone coming along and seeing him.

Pride forgotten, he sobbed.

Unnoticed by him, the door next to him opened.

A presence sat down beside him. Long hair tickled his nose…long, auburn hair.

He jerked his head up to see into her eyes, wiping a hand angrily across his own. A lone tear ran down his cheek and Lily, with all the gentleness of an angel, wiped it with one finger.

"I'm sorry," he said, proud he'd managed to. She smiled a true smile and he leaned forward to capture her in a kiss.

Sliding one arm around her waist, he pulled her closer. "This is far enough."

Sappy, I know…lol. Make my day, push that review button!


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